Bless Kylie Jenner‘s deep need to document her every move. Because now it’s given all of us plebs an inside look into the biggest wedding blowout of the year — Kourtney Kardashian and Travis Barker‘s lush ceremony in Italy.

The newly-hitched couple got married for a third time over in Italy in the kind of show-stopping event that Kris Jenner would approve of. Everything was adorned with candles and dripping in gold Italian décor and red velour as Travis and Kourtney said their vows in front of a bumper crowd of friends and family.

It was all so bloody decadent, all except for one detail: the food.

Thanks to the various siblings and kids of the Kardashian-Jenner-Barkers, those of us sitting at home in our trackies and not on the back of a yacht in Italy got a look in, too.

Over on TikTok Kylie posted up a bunch of vids from inside the reception, basically giving everyone a behind-the-scenes squiz of what’s most certainly going to be a three-parter episode of The Kardashians in due time.

One particular vid has subsequently gone viral after fans spotted the sad-looking portions of food.

In the vid shared to IG, a chef uses a ladle and tongs to serve a teeny tiny amount of pasta on a plate.

Folks have taken to Twitter to slam the abject travesty of serving pasta in ITALY, of all places, with such small portions.

@kyliejenner

an icon a legend

♬ original sound – Kylie Jenner

There’s Kim Kardashian in a hell of a bejewelled bodysuit.

@kyliejenner

i love weddings

♬ original sound – Kylie Jenner

There’s Kylie, Kendall Jenner and Khloé Kardashian having a boogie (??) at their table to the Bee Gees.

@kyliejenner

it’s the finger for me

♬ original sound – Kylie Jenner

And then there’s Kris just absolutely demolishing the dance floor with Landon Barker‘s mate Carl Dawson, which honestly I have to respect. Go off, mum.

Speaking of the Barker kids, both Landon and Alabama lit up Instagram with their own footage from the big night. Landon — in a gorgeous silver glittery suit — was spotted belting out “Die In California” with Machine Gun Kelly.

And Alabama went right ahead and posted up a video of her dad Travis taking Kourtney’s black garter belt off with his teeth — easily the most important (and fitting) wedding tradition for our chaotically horny parents.

kourtney kardashian travis barker italy wedding instagram
Thank you for your service, Alabama. [Image: Instagram / @alabamaluellabarker]
Honestly looking at all of this behind-the-scenes/insider footage makes me want to watch the eventual Kardashians episode it’ll be so I can just really lean into the fact that someone’s out there living my 00s emo kid wedding fantasies.

Love this for them (and us).

Image: TikTok / @kyliejenner / Instagram / @kourtneykardash / @alabamaluellebarker