Alright folks, it’s time to put your best sleuthing hats on and go absolutely hog wild on the conspiracies.
Today’s game: what are Kim Kardashian and Kanye West going to name their brand new baby daughter?
The couple already have North, 4, and Saint, 2, so lets get this one out of the way and say it’s not going to be anything normal like Emma or Olivia or Charlotte McKenzie III.
But historically they’re open to suggestions from the greater public. As Kim explained in 2014, they got North’s name from tabloid rumours, deciding to go ahead with it after getting the nod of approval from tastemakers Anna Wintour and Pharrell Williams.
And now that we have some guidelines to work with – not a ‘K’ name, kinda bizarre, possibly one syllable?? – people are going to town on the speculation.
Wild West seems to be a common one, as well as its stupider spelling, Wilde West.
I hope Kim Kardashian and Kanye West name their new baby daughter “Wild Wild” for the culture.
— NUFF (@nuffsaidny) January 16, 2018
If Kim Kardashian doesn’t name her baby Wild West what’s the point
— NORTH WEST (@Its_North_West) January 18, 2018
Kardashian baby name predictions:
Gaëa West
Babylon West
Mystery (should have named her Debbie) West
Wilde West
Yeeza West
West West— gayle benson’s personal shopper (@floppingshist) January 16, 2018
But they’re not the only ones out there – Tuesday Winter is a dope name, tbh.
What if Kim and Kanye name their baby Tuesday Winter West since it’s Tuesday and it’s winter time pic.twitter.com/gXslGdCuqD
— D.T. (@Darlene26811165) January 16, 2018
Now we’ve got an even BIGGER conspiracy on our hands, because Kim posted this pic of the Louis Vuitton branding to her Instagram.
There was no caption. Of course there wasn’t. Kim you hussy, you know we’re desperate for info.
But EVEN thought this is very much Kimmy’s Instagram ~aesthetic~ (a.k.a. selfies alternating with close ups of random shit, all in this beautiful warm brown tone that she’s been working with for months now, NOT THAT I’VE BEEN STALKING OR ANYTHING)…. where was I? Right – even though this pic is pretty much on-brand for her, fans reckon she’s dropping hints about her baby’s name.
Guys, this is Kim Kardashian West. SHE’S NOT GOING TO NAME HER BABY ‘LOUISE‘ LIKE IT’S A NORMAL HUMAN CHILD AND SHE COULDN’T THINK OF A MORE INTERESTING MIDDLE NAME*.
The most likely situation here is that Kim was sent a nice piece of Louis Vuitton luggage and as part of her contractual obligation, needed to do a little shout-out on Instagram.
Or maybe her kid really is called LV. Lord help us all.
*Love, a fellow ‘Louise’-middle-name-haver.
