Another day, another video of Kendall Jenner just… struggling. This time while attempting to walk up the stairs in a skintight dress. Honestly, I live for this shit. Consider it reparations.
Watching the BTS videos and pics from Kourtney Kardashian and Travis Barker‘s third (!!!) wedding event was very much an exercise in embodying the phrase “oh, how the other half lives”.
Sure, I’m bitter. These girlies are rich, out of touch, racially problematic and living their best life. Meanwhile I, an angel with no flaws whatsoever, must be a cog in the capitalist machine. In what world is this fair!
But every now and then (read: literally weekly at this stage) these women embarrass themselves, and you bet your ass I am here to revel in it. The only way to sooth the bad taste in my mouth when I see rich people happy.
Enter this video Kylie Jenner posted to her Instagram Story of her sister Kendall walking up brick stairs in the most bizarre fashion I have ever seen.
The video shows Kendall with her tight dress hiked up, feet in Birkenstocks as she tries to lift her knees at a height that allows movement without ruining her lewk. The struggle is real, and quite frankly this could be a metaphor for my life.
Truly, her movements are mesmerising. It’s like watching a baby deer take its first steps, if the deer was an alien trying it’s best to convince you this is how baby deer walk.
The footage is almost as awkward as that video of Kendall cutting a cucumber that went viral earlier this month.
The reality star couldn’t quite grasp how to cut the long boi, having her arms crossed above the table while she held the cucumber the wrong way around as she tried to cut it. All with her mum Kris Jenner simply begging a chef to come rescue Kendall in the background before she lost a finger.
In a way, these videos bring me comfort. If you can be this rich and famous and still constantly fuck up basic tasks, then I for one am doing just fine. Yay for competence.