The Internet Has Gone Into Meltdown Over Chris Pratt & Anna Faris’ Split

Those of you absolutely reeling from the 12 pound brick to the heart that was Chris Pratt and Anna Faris announcing their split after 8 years of marriage are absolutely not alone.

No one is coping with this horrendous news. No one. Not a single person. We’re all feeling it.

Pratt and Faris announced on social media that their relationship would be coming to an amicable end. The duo met back in 2007 and were married by mid-2009.

And it’s on social media that those unable to deal with the bombshell – read: everyone with a heartbeat and an account login – have been wailing into the horrible, loveless night.

It’s a tough, tough time for everyone. The saddest day.

Pratt and Faris’ sudden break-up has everyone wary of the fleetingness and fragility of even the most seemingly solid celebrity relationships, and the fallout of that has sent everyone scrambling into protection mode. The other good couples! They must be maintained at ALL COSTS.

Solution: All celebrity couples deemed to be “good” by the internet to be put into temporary lockdown until the sign sworn statements assuring the public they’re in no danger of splitting up.

Sure, the extra stress that’d place on the relationship might be detrimental to its overall health, but this is for the greater good, god damn it.

BRB playing this on a loop for the next forever and sobbing uncontrollably.