Casual Reminder That ‘The Incredibles’ Saved An Otherwise Meh 2004

incredibles
Contributor: Louis Costello

It’s hard to believe that The Incredibles came out 14 years ago.

While some of us were battling the notorious fluoro trend, lurking around Westfield or just being a general pest, others were flocking to the cinemas to witness Pixar‘s best release (at the time) since A Bug’s Life. Keep in mind this is complete conjecture, FYI, so don’t get all defensive over other Pixar movies that could arguably be better than A Bug’s Life.

Raking in over $600 mill, The Incredibles was critically acclaimed and became an immediate classic. For some of us, it also served as a clear highlight of 2004. Not just in the movie department, but across the board. Sceptical? Here’s why you shouldn’t be.

We’ve gathered some of the more noteworthy moments of 2004 and explicitly pointed out just why they pale in comparison to the cultural phenomenon that was The Incredibles.

The Motorola Razr Debuts

We’ve all secretly longed for the days where the Motorola Razr was still the “it” phone. It had everything you need in a pocket companion – you could flip it to hang up on someone in a dramatic tantrum, there was no social media to stress about and it took super grainy snaps which hid your many flaws. Ah, the good old days.

Why didn’t it match up to the epic release of The Incredibles? For starters, The Incredibles had its own Motorola Razr. Are we straight-up forgetting Elastigirl? While it was cool that the Motorola could fold in half, the badass mum of three could contort herself into knots. Genuine knots. Not to mention the time she morphed into an actual parachute to save her children from almost-certain death. But please, do go on about how the Motorola could fold in one direction.

Mars Rover Makes A Recovery

The fact that the Mars Rover was able to exist at all is an insane accomplishment in itself, but NASA‘s ability to resurrect a broken machine while it sits on an unknown planet, 54.6 million kilometres away from Earth, is unfathomable.

However, once again The Incredibles swoops in to take the crown of most resilient technology. Syndrome‘s Omnidroid, designed exclusively to off heroes one-by-one, adapts to its surroundings, repairs itself and is close to indestructible. Take that, NASA.

Of course, we know by now that the Omnidroid was eventually destroyed by Mr Incredible, but it took literal super-strength for the Omnidroid to be vanquished.

Nollsy’s ‘What About Me?’ Hits #1

After his crushing loss in 2004’s Australian Idol (where he famously lost to our other national treasure, Guy Sebastian), Shannon Noll hit the ground running with the release of his whine of a song, What About Me? While it was evident that Nollsy was pretty damn bitter about not taking out the title, personally it came across as super self-serving.

I may be alone in that one though, as What About Me? went on to snag the #1 position on the ARIA charts (and number 28 in America‘s Billboard Hot 100). The main problem though? Syndrome, the batshit evil villain in The Incredibles, came out with his very own “What About Me?“…in monologue form:

“See? Now you respect me, because I’m a threat. That’s the way it works. Turns out there are lots of people, whole countries, that want respect, and will pay through the nose to get it. How do you think I got rich? I invented weapons, and now I have a weapon that only I can defeat, and when I unleash it…”

This is objectively a more eloquent and profound alternative to Nollsy repeatedly complaining that it “isn’t fair” over and over again. Syndrome for the win.

Michael Phelps’ World Record

Michael Phelps began to gain some serious attention on an international level when he broke the world record in the 400m individual medley race in 2004, which also earned him a gold medal and raised his overall tally for that year to eight medals.

This is all well and good in theory, but, um, hello? Are we just sleeping on Dash purposely coming second in a running event just to let some other dweeb come first? Get outta here.

Oh yeah, really good achievement Michael Phelps. No seriously, bravo. You swam an Olympic sized pool in what, four minutes? Dash can literally run across water like some sort of mutant Jesus, so no. I’m not impressed and Phelps’ accomplishments, while impressive in their own rights, is no match for Dash or the Incredibles clan. Swim away, Phelps.

Janet Jackson’s Wardrobe Malfunction

Janet Jackson‘s wardrobe malfunction at the Super Bowl (or rather, Justin Timberlake‘s major faux pas that threw Janet Jackson under the bus) was a notorious moment for 2004. It all could have been prevented though if they simply took a leaf out of Edna Mode’s book.

Avoid wearing anything that could have the potential to ruin your career and end your life. While Edna is specifically referring to capes, her pearls of wisdom could have been transferred over to Janet Jackson’s costume. Perhaps, to avoid the grabby nature of a certain someone (Justin Timberlake), avoid wearing anything that can easily be ripped off.

If you’re still not convinced that The Incredibles was by far the best thing to happen to 2004, here’s the teaser of Disney Pixar’s Incredibles 2 to remind you of the awesome power that is the Incredibles family:

Disney Pixar’s Incredibles 2 drops June 14th. Don’t miss it, bbs.

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