Your Horos Are Here: Aquarius, That Thing You’ve Been Avoiding Will Bite You In The Ass

Folks belonging to my fellow water sign, Cancer, needa learn to drop the act and show your vulnerability, and my Gemini pals needa beware of incoming chaos this week.

Welcome to Your Horos Are HerePEDESTRIAN.TV’s new weekly horoscope series. Every Sunday night, we’ll be looking to the week ahead and seeing what those chaotic mistresses of the sky have in store for us – and by us, we mean you.


As the commanding, forceful, take-charge ram of the zodiac, you generally prefer to be a leader, rather than a follower, so the idea of having to ask for help is literal torture for you. But this week, you’ll have to put your stubbornness aside and reach out to other sources for assistance and advice on getting shit done. At some point this week (could possibly be at a Chrissy party), you’ll meet a shy soul who’s intimidated by your outgoing personality. Try and ease your approach with this person and you may end up being good mates.


A mistake from your past is lingering around like a bad smell. It’s something you’ve done when you weren’t in your right state of mind and you haven’t been able to forgive yourself. Well, now is the time to finally let it go and learn to accept the fuck up and realise that just ‘cos you cooked it once or twice in the past, it doesn’t make you a bad person. Chances are, whoever was impacted by your screw up has already forgiven you, now it’s time for you to forgive yourself. And honestly if they still haven’t forgiven you, it’s time you accept that things are donezo and get on your with your life.


There’s someone in your life who you admire for their sass, outspokenness and ability to hold their own in a fight. But this week you might end up on the receiving end of their chaotic energy and while Geminis are no strangers to chaos, you’ll find that you don’t quite know how to handle this unexpected and unpleasant scenario. Sure, you don’t share their skills, but by the same token, they don’t share yours, so the best thing you can do here is use the tools at your disposal to handle this drama head-on and hope to settle it as calmly and quickly as possible. It’s the holidays, FFS.


Because of all you’ve been through, you often feel the need to show folks that you’ve got a hard, unbreakable shell, not unlike the crab (your sign’s symbol). But sometimes it’s necessary to show your vulnerability in order to help people get to know you and understand what you’re all about. Whether it’s the dude you’re dating who hasn’t seen you drop the tough bitch act yet or a colleague who thinks you’re as tough as nails, when really their wise cracks tick you off. This week let down your walls down a lil and show people that beneath that hard exterior, there’s a soft (but powerful) Cancerian heart.


Leos tend to get a bad wrap because they’re, well, show offs. But TBH, not only is this part of their charm (and an essential in every friend group / at every social gathering), but their lion vibe also means that they’re loyal and true to their word. But unfortunately this week, you’ll learn that not everyone is as reliable and trustworthy as you are and you’ll find out that someone has been fucking you over (particularly in the work / study / money sphere). Make like it’s Mercury Retrograde and double check all documents and have a long hard think before agreeing to anything ‘cos the stars smell a rat.


You’ll find yourself at a crossroads this week, Virgo, and you’ll finally need to make that decision that you’ve been putting off for so long. Now, Virgos are usually fab decision makers and always know what they want and aren’t afraid to ask for it in a clear and concise manner, but this time it’s something you’re rather unsure about. Although you might be pulling one way ‘cos you feel that you have more of an attachment to that side, the stars ask you to consider the other option, no matter how daunting it may seem. Only you know the answer here, just make sure you think through every possible avenue.


As much as people-pleasing Libra signs love to keep the peace with everyone, it’s not always possible to make all your mates happy and sometimes when you try to do so, no one ends up satisfied (including yourself). This week, an ongoing situation in your life is highlighted as you’re trying desperately to get things right but it’s not so easy to do. Just remember that not everyone is worthy of your time and if people are demanding it and not taking your sitch into account then, frankly, they don’t deserve your love and affection. Don’t let yourself be pulled in a million different directions. Cut the indecisive Libran crap and just do what YOU want to do.


Ugh, fuck me. The week starts out with a big emotional burden that’s hanging over you like a storm cloud. Unfortunately the only thing that’ll help you alleviate said burden is by seeking some sage advice from someone you trust, and once you’re reassured that things will be all sweet, you’ll feel much better. Now, I know Scorpios generally prefer to keep their problems to themselves so as not to bother other folks (and also to keep their private matters private), but only by talking about what’s been bugging you will the metaphorical storm pass.


It’s still your szn and you should be living your best life but given that it’s the busiest time of the year, naturally a bunch of annoying shit is going to pop up and kill your vibe. This week there’ll be a task that you just can’t bloody complete the way you want to and it’ll end up being a huge-ass head fuck. As much as you wanna ditch this drama ASAP, you won’t be able to until you clear your mind and come up with a solution. Don’t resort to doing a rush job, think things through, phone a friend, even try and forget about the problem for a full day then return to it the next day. You got this.


There’s so much sick shit planned for the coming weeks and being an organisation-driven Capricorn who likes to know what’s going on, you’ve done all your research on said plans (hell, you probs even created the FB invite). But as with everything in life, sometimes a spanner gets thrown into the works and although your mates are telling you to go with flow, that’s just not in your nature. This week you need to take a leaf out of your more chill mates’ book and just kick back and roll with whatever ends up happening.


You’ve been putting off a certain task, telling yourself that you’ll have plenty of time to get it done later. Well guess what? Later is now. This week you’ll have to tackle something head-on and you’ll be pretty damn frustrated knowing that had you done it earlier, your life would be much easier right now, but what can ya do? Just learn from it and try and be more organised next time. Elsewhere, there’s something in your life that’s causing you emotional anxiety and this week it’ll really start to impact you. You need to find a way to confront the problem.


As a water-based Pisces, you’re v. sensitive to the moods of the folks around you. You pick up the energy and mood of people who you spend the most time with and that often, in turn, impacts your own state of being on any given day. This week is bound to be filled with a few highs and lows, but because you’re so fkn busy, you don’t have time to be bogged down by other people’s drama. Approach negative situations / negative people with as much positivity you can muster and hopefully they’ll benefit from your upbeat energy, rather than letting you both be dragged down by their bad vibes.