The Sozzled Unit Who Left This Note On An Unlocked Car Is Truly All Of Us

Drunk folks do the damndest things! When I’m drunk I like to give everyone “friendship kisses” and also to tell bouncers at clubs that I’m one of the Real Housewives Of Sydney. Sometimes I branch out and say I’m Lea Michele. You never know.

The point is people do stupid fucking shit when they’re drunk, and while there are BAD things you should never do (coward punch people or swat girls butts, for example) some drunk behaviour is just bloody endearing, isn’t it. Just FunTown Arizona population you and everyone hearing your story.

The guy or girl who wrote this note left on a Bracken Ridge resident’s unlocked car? They’ve got a yarn to tell, because their note’s gone Aussie-viral.

In case you can’t read the scrawl, it says:

I love cars, am drank (sic). Just looking at cars going past. Nothing missing (that’s not me) but I was raised in an area where this was everyday. Bad things can still happen to good people, lock your car. Good luck with your success in life and remember smile.

Few things here. One is this person’s joyous love of cars. An entire first sentence just about loving cars sick. Just gotta tell folks I love cars rn.

Then, there’s the not-at-all-reassuring mention of “nothing missing” with the cryptic “that’s not me” right after it. What does that MEAN. That’s not me???

Finally, this line is me forever when I’m blotto and you cannot tell me otherwise. “Good luck with your success in life and remember smile”. NOT that I go up to people and tell them to smile – gross – but the wildly dramatic over the top blessings? Extremely seen over here.

The car’s owner, Jamie-Lee Chilcott, spoke to about finding the note, explaining that it was probably her kid that left it unlocked.

“We did lock the car, but have a feeling my son might have accidentally picked up the keys and clicked the central locking button,” she said.

“I’m still shocked that nothing was taken, there were iPods and everything in the car. Who ever it was would have had to have walked up the driveway into the car.”

God bless you, drunk note-leaver, for not stealing the iPods.