In what is both an outrageous slight against a great many childhoods and one of the most obvious inevitabilities in recent memory, the forthcoming streaming monolith Disney+ is reportedly pushing forward with a series reboot of the hugely beloved – if not strategically shoddy – Mighty Ducks film series.

While you might think there are 100 different ways a potential reboot series could use the OG Ducks universe to its advantage, apparently the way they’re going with it is “The Ducks are the Hawks now.”

According to reports, the series is set to focus on a 13-year-old boy who gets kicked off the Mighty Ducks junior division side (seriously), so his Mum decides to form an entirely new team, gathering players, a coach, and a new arena.

Just… just putting aside the fact that we’re apparently ignoring how the original Ducks were built by uniting disadvantaged kids with behavioural issues, and how kicking someone off the side flies in the face of the side’s entire ethos, and that turning the Ducks – THE MIGHTY DUCKS – into the bad guys of the series is bonkers. BONKERS.

I mean it’s not like there’s an in-built storyline sitting right there for them or anything. It’s not like they could have Gordon Bombay return to Minneapolis to find a disaffected Charlie Conway, still working through his abandonment issues from childhood and walking the same path in adulthood that Bombay was. It’s not like they could have Bombay force Conway to take the reigns of the same down-on-its-luck District 5 peewee side from his youth. And it’s not like Conway, while rediscovering hockey, could wind up rediscovering himself.

It’s not like any of that isn’t right fucking there or anything.

But hell yeah. Evil Ducks. Go off, Kings.

The Mighty Ducks reboot series is reportedly scheduled to begin filming in Vancouver this coming February.