Gaze Upon The Internet’s Best And Worst Christmas Decorations With Shock And Awe

Contributor: PEDESTRIAN.TV

When I was a kid, we used to drive around our suburb looking at peoples’ Christmas light displays. We lived near one of those cul-de-sacs that went full HAM when it came to Christmas decorations, and people would come from all over to have a sticky beak. Santa would always come by in a firetruck, roads were closed so families could walk around wearing glowsticks and Santa hats, it was a whole thing.

One year we were driving past one of the less populated streets, and one front yard display really caught our eye. There were your standard lights, reindeer, you know, your regular Christmas decorations. But standing pride of place in the middle of this yard was a LARGER than life-size angel. This in and of itself would have been impressive, but some genius — an engineer, I assume, or some kind of scientist — had somehow figured out how to make the angel wave.

It wasn’t a perfect wave — in fact, it looked suspiciously like a windscreen wiper had been involved somehow, as the arm bent awkwardly back and forth from the elbow — but was it iconic? YES. Yes it was.

It got me thinking — sometimes Christmas decorations can be unbelievably slay, even if they’re not absolutely perfect, flawless constructions. Genuine heart and effort will always shine through on any creative project!

Let us take a guided tour through some of the most iconic Christmas decorations the internet has ever seen. Some of them look as though they’re taken directly from some rich mum’s Pinterest board, some of them are downright cooked. All of them, however, slay the house down boots.

Picture perfect Christmas decorations

Image: Reddit user ChallengeAcceptedBro

Look at this gorgeous baubles. According to Reddit user ChallengeAcceptedBro, their grandmother makes their own baubles every year.

“She always does something different, and these are this year’s ‘simple times from the ’30s’ bulbs,” they said.

So creative, so beautiful, so intricate. Stunning work, internet Grandma.

Image: Reddit user sirwhittlesalot

Would you look at this perfectly crafted little Santa Claus?! Reddit user sirwhittlesalot (appropriate username) proudly posted this little guy, writing “Carved myself a new little Santa to sit on the shelf this Christmas season!”

Imagine just being able to whip up something like that. I am so deeply impressed.

Well! That is definitely Christmas right there

Image: Reddit user Kaius491

Merry Sastmchri! Happy Chri-stm-sa! Oh whatever. The letters are green and glittery, there’s a Santa and presents next to it, we get what the letters are meant to spell out. It’s very clearly a Christmas decoration. Or maybe it’s even a little surprise festive-themed word jumble?

Image: 9NEWS

This photo is sending me because firstly, I love a concise theme. This person chose Grinch and stuck to it and I respect that. The next thing I absolutely love is the rich geographical information we’re getting here. Computer — enhance!

If we look closely, we can plainly see that the pictured sign indicates that Ballarat and the Grinch’s Lair are in the same direction. I don’t know why that’s so funny but it just is, OK? I don’t make the rules.

Hey — at least you gave it a go!

Image: Reddit user BillyCool

Now this is just really something, isn’t it? How does one get their Christmas decorations to look like they are melting? Drape some string lights across your house and ensure that there is no discernible pattern or grouping or method, of course. It’s just art.

Image: Reddit

There’s something quite slay about this candle (it’s a candle right?). Gold and black, an eternally slay combination. The evocative line, I want ALL FOR ~Christmas~ IS… — with all its obscure emphasises and mystifying font choices. I don’t know, it just really means something to me, you know? Sometimes I really do want All FOR Christmas… is…

Image: Reddit user torpleknoped

Ho… Lov… Joy… Pee… Pe… Christ… Ce. There’s a lot to love about this one, obviously, but I think my favourite part is Pee Christ. Also, I adore the fact that I honestly could not tell you what this image is actually supposed to say. It’s like a word find but they forgot to put the words in and only put the extra letters in. Holov! Joype! Pee Pe!

Image: Reddit

Christmas decorations with threatening auras, anyone? I kind of don’t even know where to start here. Rudolph holding this elf-child in a headlock? The kid seemingly begging Santa for their life? The way Rudolph’s spare hoof is holding on by like, one thread of skin? Despite all of this — or potentially because of it — I would still buy this sign. It’s a relic, a historical document. A Christmas slay.