Chrissy Teigen Documents The Stresses Of Her First NFL Fantasy Draft Party

I honestly didn’t think I could relate more to Chrissy Teigen (minus all the being married to John Legend and also having babies with John Legend thing), but here we are. A woman who is a true novice at NFL fantasy league, attending her first-ever fantasy draft party.

[jwplayer 5jao5UgW]

If you’re not aware of what these things are – because I sure as hell don’t get it – a draft party is a get-together that a fantasy football group puts on where everyone figures out their teams for the upcoming season.

Look, I don’t understand a lot about fantasy football but essentially I think you get a bunch of players (?) from a heap of different teams to build a ~fantasy~ team (???) Depending on each player’s performance in their actual teams in reality each week, the players get a score/number and that goes toward their fantasy league. Or something. I don’t know I honestly stopped listening to myself about three sentences ago.

ANYWAY, what I do know is that people who are super into this fantasy footy thing, especially the NFL one, have a big party to figure out their teams for each year. A friend of mine drove all the way down to Canberra and back in 48hrs for one. They’re typically booze-soaked affairs where everyone gets stressed when the internet cuts out.

Chrissy Teigen attended her first fantasy draft party today with John and decided to go all-out for their NFL fantasy league brunch ‘do. Oh, and she put all her minor fails and slight bewilderment of it on Twitter and her Instagram story for us all to appreciate.

It begins with a sign; a big whiteboard welcoming the league to their humble abode, where Chrissy realised that the whole fantasy thing is online so having a physical whiteboard to write down team lists was pretty null and void almost instantly. Oh well, please say hello to the Grown Ass Men.

Not only that but Chrissy had hats (!!!) made for the league. I want this hat. Hats absolutely do not suit my weird head whatsoever but I want one of these hats that say GROWN ASS MEN’S LEAGUE across the front.

Of course, as is the unspoken law with literally any party that you go to – there wasn’t not enough ice. There is never enough ice. No matter if you tell every person coming to your house to bring a bag of ice there is somehow some glitch in the Matrix at some point between them arriving and you putting the ice in the esky that results in there not being enough.

In Chrissy’s case, there were about 16 cubes of ice (thanks to John) to somehow cool three bottles of champagne. Not to worry, a mum will always figure out a workaround.

Murphy’s Law struck again when the internet (of course) decided to be a total shit, and sent the league’s members into a slight blind panic, feverishly demanding the password to the wifi so they didn’t fuck up their draft picks.

Look at this man’s face. LOOK AT IT. That’s the face of a man whose heart is about to burst out of his chest in pure fear because technology, true to form, is working against him in a time of need.

Chrissy put on brunch for the league which, looking at her Insta stories, seemed to be some kind of football-shaped pancakes, fried chicken, scrambled eggs, and caviar. Normel Monday brunch. Totally normel.

Finally, a fantasy draft party isn’t complete or successful without the announcement of who’s on your NFL fantasy team so John introduced the draft picks for their daughter, Luna Simone Stephens.

Looks like some good recruits, I’m putting my money on Baby-Mingo for being a good pick up this year.

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