Children’s Centre Closed Due To Sexy After Hours Swinging Party

Understandable outrage has ensued after details of the most poorly chosen location for a sex party—at a Cranbourne children’s play centre—have been released. Owners of the children’s centre have disgusted parents with their Craigslist advertisement featuring raunchy, nude photos of themselves—posted for a party planned to be held last Saturday.  

The couple decided to not-so-modestly advertise that “this sexy couple” were seeking other, similarly sexy couples (single men not allowed! Don’t be gross!) for a very sexy sex party at their “venue” (“not a house”). They pointed out that they were “very new to the scene” (oh really?) and promised a “laser light show, fog machines, great sound system, games and giant ball pit and jumping castle.” Mmmmm, toddler’s jumping castles. Sexy. I’m not sure what kind of night-club cum brothel of a childcare centre these people are running, but if it weren’t for the inevitable crayon drawings lining the walls and a distinct toddler inspired decorations, maybe this would be a really awesome time. Nah, probably not. 

A mother who had organised her son’s birthday celebrations to be held at the centre on the same day was clearly grossed out upon hearing the news, providing a foul mental image, “’This is so morally wrong, not to mention unhygienic.” Another mother, who must have skimped on sex education, said: “My son is one, he puts balls in his mouth and everything, god knows what STDs could be in there.”

The City of Casey council has issued the centre with a planning contravention notice and has since been temporarily closed.

Via The Age.