Do you ever just stare out a window and think about how Chet Hanks is Tom Hanks‘ son? I do, I did that the other day, actually, because I stumbled upon one of Chet’s new “white boy summer” videos on Instagram. You could argue the last however many years has been white boy summer, but according to Chet – this summer is white boy summer.
What is white boy summer, you ask? I-I still don’t know, actually. I’ve watched almost all of Chet’s white boy summer videos and I’m still confused. Plus, this was the first time I heard Chet speak in his real accent, not the Jamaican accent he regularly uses.
This all started three days ago when Chet Hanks hopped on Instagram and uploaded a video of himself, predicting that this summer is going to be a “white boy summer”.
“Take it how you want, I’m not talking about Trump, NASCAR-type white, I’m talking about, you know, me, John B, Jack Harlow type white boy summer.”
For whatever reason, the video took off, so Chet made another video… and another one… and another… and another.
This one is something else.
Rihanna – yes, the actual Rihanna – commented three laughing emojis on it. I can’t tell if it’s because she thinks he’s a a fucking idiot, or because she thinks he’s funny.
Chet also went on to define what is and is not white boy summer.
“You know what’s not white boy summer? This is the epitome of not white boy summer: is having any ill will or prejudice towards anybody from a different background, race, walk of life than you – having any ill will whatsoever to anybody that’s different from you, that’s not white boy summer, dude,” he said.
“The real vibe is just having nothing but good vibes to everybody, everybody, you know what I mean? Everybody.”
You know what else isn’t white boy summer, according to Chet?
“Getting all drunk and sweaty and sunburn in your face – booze breath and going up to people that you barely fucking know and getting all in their personal space,” he said in an Instagram story.
At least he’s using his new powers to promote the bare minimum, I guess.
Also, dad hats are borderline not white boy summer.
Like clockwork, there is now white boy summer merch, which will probably be co-opted by a racist white boy.
I tried to click on Chet’s white boy summer online shop, but I got a pop-up instead that said “this site is blocked due to a security threat.” Ah well.
So, if you were wondering what’s the latest with Tom Hank’s curious son – well, there you go.
(It’s been days and I’m still trying to figure out what white boy summer is, or maybe that’s part of it. What are you doing, Chet? What are you doing?)