This Bride’s List Of  ‘Rules & Regulations’ Include Not Talking To Her At All

Reddit has once again done the deed and delivered us another interesting bride, this time with a complete list of rules and regulations her guest must follow.

Posted to Reddit on Thursday, users were treated to a screenshot of an email from a wedding coordinator. That’s it – no rant, no salty words, no bewildered comments – just a screenshot.

It begins in the way one would expect an email to begin: “Good morning, My name is ___, I am the wedding coordinator for ____ and ____ Sanders. I am reaching out to all confirmed guests to do a final head count and go over some rules and regulations of the wedding day. First of all, are you still attending with a plus one?” 

All good and merry – no red flags.

And then it begins.

Credit: Reddit

The bride knows what she wants and that’s NO HUMAN CONTACT.

Let’s break this down, shall we?

Rule 1. Please arrive 15-30 minutes early.

Fair enough, no problems here.

Rule 2. Please DO NOT wear white, cream or ivory.

It’s their wedding day, I’m cool with this.

Rule 3. Please do not wear anything other than a basic bob or ponytail. 

A bit much but okay.

Rule 4. Please do not have a full face of makeup. 

…why?

Rule 5. Do not record during the ceremony.

This doesn’t seem too bad.

Rule 6. Do not check in on FB until instructed. 

Do people still do this?

Rule 7. Use #____ when posting all pictures. 

I mean, this is one way to have all your pictures in one place so I’m going to let it slide.

Rule 8. DO NOT TALK TO THE BRIDE AT ALL. 

WHY?

Rule 9. Everyone will toast with Rémy. No exceptions (?)

Like the person or the drink?

Rule 10. Lastly, must come with gift $75 or more or you won’t be admitted in.

Do you have to bring a bloody receipt as proof of purchase?

You’ve got to give it to the wedding coordinator though because they’re acting as if this isn’t the worst they’ve ever seen and let’s be real, it probably isn’t.

Interestingly, Redditors reckon this email isn’t actually from the wedding coordinator but the bride or bridesmaids who may have had one too many and somehow used the wedding coordinator’s phone… hence the spelling errors. A good theory.

Others simply just commented: “What an excellent list of reasons to not go.”

Still, this doesn’t come close to The Adventures ofSusan‘.

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