TV Shows You Shouldn’t Binge In One Sitting, Mainly ‘Cos They’ll Ruin Your Life

There’s nothing quite like the moment you get deeply invested in a TV series to the point where your entire life revolves around it. Your best friend’s 30th? Fuck that. Your sister is in labour with her first child? Lol deal with it yourself, Sally. Nothing and no one will come between you and your show until it’s over and you feel the cold emptiness in your soul where your new “best friends” (characters who are not real) once lived.

But some shows are too much to binge. Some shows are downright dangerous, in fact. They’ll not only consume your free time, they’ll take over your life and have you genuinely thinking you can a) change careers entirely or b) act exactly like the characters and have it go well for you.

Here are some TV shows we recommend you consume responsibly.

THE SOPRANOS

One of the TV greats, The Sopranos makes the mafia look bad… but also like a good time in a way, you know? Plus it’s just a bunch of extremely angry people going around getting folks back for wrongdoings, so your revenge levels will be through the roof.

“Once watched three seasons in two and a half days and had to fight a wild and sudden urge to shakedown the cashier at Coles afterwards.” – Cam

CALL THE MIDWIFE

This BBC period drama about midwives in the 50’s and 60’s gets you right in there in the delivery room.

“I’m watching call the midwife at the moment and I’m pretty sure I know how to deliver a baby now.” – Sam

BREAKING BAD

The iconic show about a normal dude with terminal illness hanging over his head dropping everything to become a big-time meth chef is so full of action and suspense, it’s easy to spend an entire week dedicated to it – but be warned you’ll probably think a life of drug dealing seems a lot less dodge than it did pre-watch.

“There was a moment mid-way through bingeing Breaking Bad where I genuinely thought a career in meth production might be feasible.” – Mel

ALIAS

An oldie but a goodie about a seriously bitchin’ spy who could (probably) kill a man with her bare hands still holds up in 2k18.

“When I watched Alias I thought I wanted to be a spy and tried to apply for ASIO after finishing school
but then mum reminded me that I’m scared of cockroaches and therefore would not be able to fight Russians.” – Josie

SONS OF ANARCHY

The often brutal and incredibly addictive series about SAMCRO, a motorcycle gang from small-town Charming, gets you so into it’s world you’ll absolutely be Googling cheap motorbikes on Gumtree after you finish. Can totally see how that guy on Love Island has gotten so obsessed.

“When I binged SOA, I went through this period of only swiping guys on Tinder who either said they rode motorbikes, or had a motorbike-riding vibe to them.” – Sarah

GOSSIP GIRL

These teenage schoolchildren have the most ridiculous wardrobe and lifestyle, you’ll either finish the series feeling depressed about your own fast-fashion wardrobe, or go spend money you don’t have on a Gucci handbag.

“I bought a fancy designer thing after Gossip Girl, then promptly returned it when I remembered I’m poor.” – Kassia

WORKAHOLICS

This very bingeable comedy series about some stoner colleagues who do shit-all at the office and spend their entire existence enjoying the good times will absolutely have you blowing off your 9-5 for fun japes with your mates. Or just doing ’em at work.

“I went through a phase of watching Workaholics every weekend, a period in which the amount of weed I smoked spiked dramatically.” – Joel

OUTLANDER

The extremely horny period drama that centres on the almost-perfect love between Jamie and Clare Fraser is as gripping as it is sexy, so it’s incredibly easy to sit down on a Friday night to give it a whirl and wind up crying into your microwave dinner during S2E10 by Sunday evening.

“I watched all of Outlander in one sitting about a year back, and became so enamoured with Jamie Fraser that I honest to god cried at the end of the available episodes because I realised he wasn’t real, and therefore couldn’t make babies with me.” – Mel

TOP GEAR

This is one of those shows you can easily watch a billion episodes of on a hungover Sunday, but all that speedy driving is gonna really make you think putting your pedal to the metal is a brilliant idea.

“I once almost ran over my friend in a paddock after watching too much Top Gear.” – David

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