Brittany Hockley, the woman all saw get dumped on the telly last night, can pinpoint some bad vibes coming from Nick Cummins on their final Bachie date, which made her feel uneasy.
Specifically, she noticed that what he was saying out loud to her, all the compliments, seemed to be in opposition to his “energy“. She reckons that by the end of their time together he was making up reasons not to choose her and that “doesn’t make sense“.
The things Nick was saying and his energy were very contradicting towards the end: he was saying everything you wanted to hear, things that didn’t make it to air as well but just how perfect we were together, and it blows his mind that we have so much in common, so much compatibility, and y’know, saying everything I wanna hear, but I just felt like there was a shift in his energy that really, really left this big, lingering cloud of doubt.
And also there was that one throwaway line of him saying, ‘Oh also I think we’re on the wrong timeline,’ which to me was him searching for a reason, because he knew very well we were on exactly the same timeline, and he had told me that multiple times. So that was really a last ditch attempt at finding a reason for it not to be me.
Hockley noticed the hella weird way Cummins worded his rejection – “I can’t give 100% of me to you… [so] I have to let you go” – seemed designed to spare her feelings but effectively say he wasn’t ready for a relationship. For her, that idea, that the Bachelor himself isn’t ready to be with anyone is “just crazy, because if you’re not ready, you’re on the wrong show. You need to be on Survivor or something“.
Still she reckons Badge came on the show to actually find a partner, not just to raise his profile.
I hope he went in with [romantic] intentions. I think to get through it you’ve gotta think that. Somewhere along the way he got a little bit lost and confused and it wasn’t his environment. I guess you have to ask Nick that because I’m as lost as everybody else. I can’t quite put my finger on where it went wrong and when it happened for him. For me, I have to have some faith that this was what supposed to happen.
Hockley returns to the point that “everything happens for a reason“, and says she does find solace in that, despite how difficult it was to relive her heartbreak by watching the finale last night. Still, she notes it’s particularly hard given Cummins’ ultimate choice to choose neither her nor Sophie Tieman. She says she’s not relieved he decided not to string her along any longer.
It’s one thing to put yourself on the line and know it just wasn’t you and he walked away with someone else. But it’s another thing to know that it was never going to be anyone. You let yourself feel something and we wonder at the end of the day why.
I just think he should’ve given it a go with someone to be honest. I just don’t get it. We both had such a good connection with him. We weren’t asking for marriage or anything, we just wanted a week in the real world to see if it was actually there outside of that pressure cooker. But Nick just wasn’t even willing to give it a day. I mean come on.
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‘Wowee.’ Living it the first time was so hard, but reliving it tonight was something else.???? After a very long and incredible journey, I found myself standing at the end with a full heart and excited at the prospect of a happy future with Nick. I believe everything happens for a reason, and by this point I truly believed I was meant to come here and meant to meet Nick. From the very beginning we connected on so many levels, some you saw, and some you unfortunately didn’t. I was in disbelief and thought surely this was the reason I hadn’t met anyone in a long time. But that is not the case. Unfortunately it is not my time.???? I gave it my all and was always true to myself, honest and risked it for the biscuit. I wore my heart on my sleeve and I’m proud of myself for putting myself out there. Whilst this is not my happy ending, I made the most beautiful friends, and I am so grateful to have had Soph there with me at the end. She is truly my rock. I’m leaving with a heavy heart, but I’d like to say to all the girls that I shared this adventure with, thank you for the journey, the laughs and the memories, they will last a lifetime. To all the crew, soundies, cameramen, make up artists, stylists, production, runners, photographers, Osher, all the behind the scenes, you beautiful souls. I saw some of your hearts break when mine did, you know who you are, thank you for treating me so well always, and always making me laugh when I needed it. You made this whole experience that much greater. My family have been my rocks and really helped me through this. It’s been so hard to keep this to ourselves and deal with it on our own. Everyone that ever supported me on this crazy rollercoaster, thank you from the bottom of my broken heart. I love love and I have to believe this is just setting me on the path I’m supposed to be on. You can be sure I’ll keep on searching. Britt ✌???? ???? Xx @thebachelorau #thebachelorau #love #womensupportingwomen
The way Hockley’s decided to make sense of Badge’s rejection – and not to spiral out into self-doubt or feeling down on herself – was to remember that the issue lies with the man himself, not in herself or Tieman.
You just have to think that it was him. Between Sophie and I, we all had so much compatibility and we had such a great time. I look at Sophie and she’s such an amazing human and I just think ‘How did you not even pick her?’ you know? I know how much he and I had in common so I can’t figure that out either. I think the best way is to just know it’s not us that was missing something, but maybe it was him and he wasn’t in the right space.
Since her Bachelor experience ended, she’s thrown herself into work, getting fit, and enjoying weekends away hiking with her sister. She even headed off on a cheeky wine tour of the Hunter Valley with Tieman: “We’ve been low-key sorta supporting each other.”
Hockley says while she’s “willing to date“, she’s also pretty sure a stint on Bachelor in Paradise isn’t her jam. That doesn’t mean she’s given up her quest for love: “I’m definitely willing to date. I still want to find that person, nothing changed for me. But it was real and you still do have to get yourself back to the place. My heart really was broken. It’s really real and raw. [But] I am in a good place now.“
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