Welcome back to another week in Paradise, or in tonight’s case, Hell.

Tonight’s episode of Bachelor In Paradise was an absolute shit show in every way, but I simply cannot get over the bloody fight club moment we just experienced?! Honestly, why are they fighting? Sip on a pina colada and shut up.

Seriously, we’ve got a bunch of beautiful, horny people living it up on a tropical island, I cannot comprehend why they’ve got so much built-up anger. Who’s gonna tell them how fucked up the real world is right now? Anyone? Anyone at all?

As per usual, the girls had their usual bitching back and forth, but that was just the typical ~dramaaaaaa~ we see every episode. Cass and Britt had a bit of beef over our pie lord Jackson, but that was a walk in the park compared to the shit the boys pulled.

We’re talking *almost* physical.

You know, that typical man thing where they stick their heads together but don’t actually throw hands? They kinda look like when goats butt heads, but instead of having horns, they’re just overwhelmed by their own horns (horniness, that is).

Basically, Ciarran got called out for being a bit of a snake, he then called Alisha (sweet angel) manipulative, then Timm said Matt has no friends. Ciarran got involved, it. was an ordeal. Hoo boy, is this high school?

Meanwhile, it has suddenly become crystal clear why Angie didn’t want to date any of these snakes.

Honestly, I just wish I could go back to a simpler time when we thought Timm and Ciarran were the sweetest men in the world.

At this point, I’ve just realised that a vast majority of the drama this season between the girls is literally because the men on this show are snakes. Not to mention, the physical aggression/borderline violence is *so* unattractive.

Please, can we cool it with the toxic masculinity? Men, if you’re reading this, nobody wants a guy who uses his fists over his prefrontal cortex.

At this point, we can only hope that Britt sees this bullshit.