So the first episode of season four of The Bachelorette aired last night, featuring casual transphobia, an intense rivalry between two seemingly identical men, and the premature eviction of two of Ali Oetjen‘s hopeful suitors, the one with the good hair, Brendan Cavanagh, and the guy with the kangaroo scrotum pouch, Ben Adamson.

PEDESTRIAN.TV had a chat with 29-year-old Sydney events manager/aspiring actor Cavanagh this morning, and asked him to relive his whirlwind 12 hours in the mansion.

Does 12 hours sound like an exaggeration considering the dudes started slipping out of limos as night fell, and this bloke didn’t even get to stay the night? Well, he says they finished up at about 4.30am: “It was daylight when we started and it was daylight again by the time I got back home…I pulled up at home as my housemates were leaving for work.”

Makes you wonder if all that time means gives people the opportunity to sink a lot of piss – which would go some way to explaining how tensions between Nathan Favro and Paddy Colliar escalated so quickly. But Cavanagh says the producers control the boys’ booze consumption “which makes some of the actions from last night even more surprising“.

Last night’s episode was a toned down version of what happened. On the night there was just so much going on so quick. When you’ve got Damien at 42, a wild rose, a dance crew, and then those personalities all together, it was just a recipe for sit back and get the popcorn. It wasn’t producer-influenced, it was like high school all over again. It was hectic.
[The spat between Favro and Colliar] dragged on – there was a good period there where we’re all confused as anything, going ‘What is going on?’ They’d kinda split up and then Nathan would be fumin’ and then Paddy would be fumin’, and we’re all just like ‘What’s the problem?’ It’s guys just trying to maintain some semblance of respect and pride on a reality TV show. You just go ‘Guys, you know where you are, you’re not going to have any, just deal with it, move on.’

Cavanagh for his part went into the mansion sans gimmick: “My whole schtick was I’m just here to be genuine, and be myself.” When he applied he didn’t know who the Bachelorette was – he tells us he found out before filming started when everybody else did, around the time the news was announced on Instagram.

Aside from being curious about “who this Ali person actually is versus who everyone says she is“, he says he was compelled to give finding love on reality TV a go after becoming disillusioned with dating apps.

[I was] single [and] confused as anything about the modern dating scene because last time I dated I had a [Nokia] 3310 and braces. The whole Tinder world nowadays it does my head in. At least if I go on this show I know what she’s about and I know I’ll get some decision pretty quickly, rather than messaging back and forth for weeks with nothing going anywhere. I actually got a speedier result so I see that as a win.

If anything he’s relieved to have been ousted so quickly, saying that he reckons he got a fair go on the show, even if his air time didn’t seem to reflect that.

I actually got to have two good chats with Ali over the course of a very, very, very long evening. Previous relationships came up, obviously: I’ve been married before, she’s had very well publicised relationships before. And we’ve both been stuffed around by exes and had things drag out longer than they needed to be dragged out. So to get sent home first is actually I see as almost a compliment, a respectful thing, because I’d much rather be sent home first then stuffed around and get to the end with no result, right?

So who does he see getting to the end with the woman he describes as a “beautiful person”?

I reckon Bill had a really good crack last night and I reckon he’ll go far because he is genuine, and I think the genuine ones will hopefully get pushed through. I reckon maybe Taite. Todd as well – anyone who wears that suit of armour that comfortably for that long has got something going for him. That’d be my top three.

At the end of it all, Cavanagh says he’s still single, and still confused by the dating scene, but that’s okay: “We’ll figure something out.

Image: Instagram / @brendancav