Ariana Grande Returns $130k Engagement Ring But She’s Keeping The Pig, Dammit

ariana grande engagement ring piggy smallz

Another chapter in the sad love story of Ariana Grande and Pete Davidson has come to a close, with TMZ reporting that Grande has indeed returned her whopping $130,000 (US$93,000) engagement ring. But she’s keeping the teacup pig.

The pop star and the SNL cast member called off their whirlwind engagement over the weekend, with many speculating that the death of Grande’s ex, Mac Miller, was the catalyst for the breakup.

Davidson and Grande had only been dating a month before they announced their engagement – and a $22 million New York apartment, and several matching tattoos, AND a teacup pig called Piggy Smallz. Fans were captivated. Jokes about Davidson’s financial situation were made. The world looked on, agog.

But nothing gold can stay, because it’s 2018 and love is long dead. At least the two seem to be handling the breakup like actual grown-ups. TMZ reports that there was “no struggle” over who would get to keep the ring, and that Grande was “quick to fork it over“. Rude but ok.

The ring itself is a custom-made design by New York jeweller Greg Yuna, featuring a 3.03 carat pear-shaped diamond set in platinum, a.k.a. a huge motherfucking rock.

As for Piggy Smallz, there have similarly been no scuffles over custody – she was always Ariana’s pig, and so she will stay.

Why is this so depressing to write? What is it about this sober, serious celebrity breakup that is bruising my heart so? Have we become so inured to celebrity drama that its exact opposite – this courteous, adult parting of ways – is unbearable in its closeness to real life?

Also what the hell is Davidson going to do with that hunk of diamond? These are the pressing questions of our era. May god have mercy on us all.