Amy Schumer. I’m sorry I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable from the jump, but you knew from the headline what you were getting yourself into.
The alleged comedian has returned to the stage for the first time since the Oscars and has revealed which jokes of hers were banned from the awards night. If you’re looking for laughs you’ve come to the wrong place because they’re just downright awful.
Per Vanity Fair, Schumer addressed the shenanigans of the Oscars at her show at the Mirage Theatre in Las Vegas on Saturday night.
“I don’t even know what to say about the Oscars,” she said.
“Like, I really don’t know what to say. I have no jokes about it. All I can say is that I don’t know if you saw this, but Will Smith slapped Chris Rock. Did you read that in your newsfeed?
“I was kind of feeling myself… and then all of a sudden, Ali was making his way up.”
Ali being a joke name for Will Smith, who played Ali in the movie Ali. Get it because he slapped someone, and Muhammed Ali is a boxer. Haha.
“It was just a fucking bummer,” she continued.
“All I can say is that it was really sad, and I think it says so much about toxic masculinity. It was really upsetting, but I think the best way to comfort ourselves would be for me to say the Oscar jokes that I wasn’t allowed to say on TV.”
According to Vanity Fair, Amy Schumer went on to tell her banned jokes, including one about the toad prince Joe Rogan, the sexual misconduct claims made against James Franco (which he categorically denies) and everything Alec Baldwin has been through in the last six months.
“Don’t Look Up is the name of a movie? More like don’t look down the barrel of Alec Baldwin’s shotgun,” she said.
“I wasn’t allowed to say any of that [at the Oscars], but you can just come up and [slap] someone.”
Apart from being an absolutely fkd joke, it isn’t even funny. There’s no punchline, no setup. She’s just saying things. I hate it here.
In case you don’t understand the context of the “joke”, you can read about the Alec Baldwin situation here.
Please let this be the last time we talk about this year’s truly cursed Oscars.