PEDESTRIAN.TV has partnered with LifeStyles® to get you maximum bang for your buck next time you feel like getting busy.

Of all the senses that you wanna have fully engaged while getting your fuck on, taste maybe isn’t the first that comes to mind.

You’ve got some sexy tunes going on to pleasure your earholes, lit some scented candles to mask the musk, are probs gazing into your lover’s eyes (or the pillow/headboard/back of ya pal’s head – we don’t judge), and do we really need to talk about touching? Because we can ABSOLUTELY talk about touching.

But taste? Yeah, nah. Unless you’re one of those blessed souls who is actually super into the taste of latex (why tho) or you actively seek out salt and vinegar chips because it reminds you of a sneaky salty surprise, you’re probably not really heading into a sex romp with your tastebuds aquiver.

Buuut maybe you should be. Because we’re all good little boys and girls, we all use protection (ahem, OR ELSE), right? Cool, step one to taste town done. Now you’re gonna wanna find yourself the perfect, most delicious wrapper out there for your tastes.

There are a few options on the table – or on the bed… or against a wall. Ya know.

  • Sonic Berry: GOTTA GO FAST!
  • Cappuccino: For the caffeinated couple.
  • Tutti Frutti:  When you need a little bit of summer lovin’.
  • Choc Ripple: A staple if ever we saw one.
  • Dynamint: Because you need dessert, right?

Texture is errything

Now, we mentioned that we’d absolutely talk about the touch. Did you think we were messing around? Not a bloody chance, you horny little minx. So, touch. This is not to be neglected, whether you’re copping a feel of your partner or feeling fluttery in ya nethers.

If you’re heading to pound town and want a little something extra to keep building that tension, textured condoms are your new wriggly patterned best friends. We’re talking ‘suddenly get horny whenever you see a maze or labyrinth because it reminds you of a textured rubber’ kind of best friends. The very best.

So look, here are a coupla options for you and your bud to consider:

  • LifeStyles® Ribbed: the textures in this lil’ pack of fun are alllll ribbed in different ways.
  • LifeStyles® Ultimate: ribbed frangas not enough for you? Alright cowboy, try these ribbed and studded bad boys. Plus it comes with a warming lube, so cheers for that.

Givvus that sensory overload

Look if you’re doing the job right you want your partner to have the best time ever, yes? Yes. Don’t be selfish now, this isn’t all about you. So chuck on your out of office for the weekend, switch off your notifications, grab a yourself a 24 pack LifeStyles® Party Mix and go to fucking town on each other.

Not only will you get to try out a bunch of different styles and flavours (depending on your stamina, you’ve got plenty in a pack to play with here – best of luck), but you’ll also cop a cheeky surprise gift. Hidden inside each pack is either a sexy die with exciting new positions to try on each side, or a blindfold so you too can have yourself a little NSFW taste test if you please.

So the bottom line is, there’s no reason for your sex life to be vanilla unless you want it to be, and we are 100% behind you.

Well… You know what we mean.

Image: iStock / fizkes