Just A Bunch Of Wild Excuses People Have Actually Used To Score A Sickie

Yeah, we see you, people already planning to chuck a sickie next weekend. Now, some of these will be legit. As for the rest, we’re SURE it has nothing to do with the Queen’s Birthday.

But at least you know how to keep it interesting, as a survey conducted by payroll training, consulting and advisor network The Australian Payroll Association discovered.

Over 600 payroll managers for businesses of all sizes across a range of industries were surveyed to talk about employees taking sick leave, and boy have they been given some cray reasons by employees for taking sick leave.

There was the employee who was whacked in the eye with a hard-boiled egg. Frankly, I have SO many questions about this.

Or the employee whose fish gave birth – then ate them – which left the employee in question feeling particularly unwell. Speaking of pets, apparently, a LOT of people take sick leave because they suspect their pets are depressed and need extra cuddles.

There are definitely some excuses that haven’t been thought all the way through, like the employee who took leave due to the death of a parent – for the third time. Or the employee who had been locked INSIDE the house.

Personally, I LOVE the employees who were just super honest about their situations. Like the apparently very common reason of needing to go to the doctor because of a hangover from the weekend. In case you’re wondering why that’s so funny to me – a hangover is not like other forms of sickness. Employers expect you to manage your time so that you’re functioning for work, not self-imposing a hangover so bad you can’t go to work the next day.

On that note, there’s also the employee who was simply too tired after being at a concert the night before. I also enjoy the pre-emptive excuse that of an employee who claimed the act of going to work would give them a headache.

But finally, my personal favourite, the employee who claimed to have been diagnosed with a sickness that prevents them from working with specific people. That is certainly one way to avoid co-workers you’re not so fond of. Not a GOOD way, but a way.