Woolworths Are Slinging $30 Christmas Croquembouches If The Thought Of Baking Petrifies You

If you hate baking and if the thought of touching an oven makes you recoil in disgust, Woolworths has you covered with a ready-made Christmas croquembouche and it looks fucking delicious.

No more making a half-assed chocolate ripple (I’m talking to my brother specifically here) because you don’t know how to bake, this is WAY better.

It’s a Christmas Croquembouche, how much more festive can you get?

Image: Nine

If you don’t know what a croquembouche is, you’ve clearly never watched a single season of Masterchef and I hate you for that. But all that aside, basically it’s a tower made out of profiteroles. This one is coated with buttercream, but on Masterchef they usually top it with some crispy caramel shit.

I really hate when my croquembouche doesn’t perform.

This sexy-looking dessert will serve 12 people and is topped with sprinkled pistachios and raspberry-flavoured crisps.

Woolies have also dropped a bunch of other Chrissy food items, like: pork crackling shards, Christmas ham aranchinibites, honey and fig-glazed baked brie (ooft) and my personal favourite a turducken (just kidding) . If you’ve never heard of a turkducken, it’s one of those rare foods that sound better than what it actually is. It’s a chicken stuffed inside a duck, stuffed inside a turkey. No thanks.

Woolworths Director of Buying Paul Harker said they launched these no-prep meals so customers could spend more time with family, instead of cooking all day.

“From savoury meat centrepieces to a jaw-dropping tower of white choc profiteroles, we’ve done the time-consuming prep for customers so they can spend less time in the kitchen and more time sharing delicious food with loved ones,” Harker said.

“We’re encouraging customers to be quick as we know these Christmas-infused products will be flying off the shelves across the busiest days of shopping in our stores for the year.”

I just hope the croquembouche doesn’t replace the classic Coles/Woolies mud cake.