Where To Store Everyday Foods If You’re Not A Monster

Whether or not you should store certain foods in the fridge or in a cupboard is a pretty contentious subject for a lot of people. Hell, I’ve met folks who will punch you square in the face for putting sauce in the fridge.

To see how wrong you’ve been for all these years, we looked into where the best place to store certain foods actually is.

Should I put Vegemite in the fridge?

While you can safely store it in either, Vegemite is better in the cupboard, purely for spreadability. Cold Vegemite will tear your toast right up, bitch.

According to the product’s FAQ page, it’s “a shelf stable product and once opened can be stored in the cupboard or pantry right up until the best before date”.

VERDICT: Store in the fridge if you’re a monster who would rather butcher your bread.

Do I put peanut butter in the fridge?

Peanut butter is a lot like Vegemite in that it doesn’t contain a lot of water, which, according to the CSIRO, makes it much harder for bacteria to grow.

The National Peanut Board in the US – which is an actual fucking thing – says it’s not necessary to refrigerate an opened jar of commercially manufactured peanut butter, which will keep for 3 – 4 months in a cool dark place.

However, if you take ages to eat a jar of the stuff, storing it in the fridge will extend its freshness by another 3 – 4 months.

VERDICT: Store peanut butter in the fridge if you eat it slow like a dang fool.

Should bananas be in the fridge?

If you put a ripe banana in the fridge, it’ll help it stay ripe for a few extra days, but if you put it in while it’s still green, it won’t ripen at all, even if you take it out of the fridge later. Owned.

Furthermore, the cold causes a banana’s cells to rupture and leak out digestive enzymes, which is why they turn black in the fridge. I mean, they’re a tropical fucking fruit for Christ’s sake, they don’t deal well with the cold.

VERDICT: Just store it your damn fruit bowl. Who buys bananas to store for more than a week anyway?

Should you put sauce in the fridge?

Perhaps the most fought over item of the lot, it’s the sauces.

There are a lot of condiments that fall under the sauce umbrella, but for the sake of this, let’s assume we’re talking about your standard tomato / BBQ sauces. Like the argument itself, the answer kinda falls either way, but I’ll let sauce lords, Heinz, make the call here.

“Because of its natural acidity, Heinz Ketchup is shelf-stable,” its website reads. “However, its stability after opening can be affected by storage conditions. We recommend that this product, like any processed food, be refrigerated after opening. Refrigeration will maintain the best product quality after opening.”

VERDICT: It’ll be fresher in the fridge, but it’ll probably be fine in the cupboard if you use it quick enough. Make up your own damn mind, I’m not your dad.

Do I put apples in the fridge?

Apples keep fresh for longer than most fruits, even if you keep it in your sad old fruit bowl, but chucking it in the fridge will extend its life by 2 – 4 weeks. Plus, a cold crunchy apple is the tits.

VERDICT: Store in the fridge for a superior experience. Store in a fruit bowl if you have no respect for fruit.

Should tomatoes go in the fridge?

According to research conducted by the University of Florida, storing tomatoes in the fridge weakens their flavour. Dick move.

BUT, like most of this shit, storing it in the fridge will extend its life.

VERDICT: Storing at room temperature and eating within a few days will yield the best results, but if you’re willing to trade taste for time, be my guest.

Should eggs be kept in the fridge?

You usually buy eggs from a non-refrigerated shelf, so you can keep them in a cupboard if you want to, but experts reckon you should chuck them in the fridge.

“There’s no requirement to store eggs in the fridge but we always recommend you store them in the fridge, the product will stay fresh for longer,” CSIRO senior food microbiologist, Cathy Moir, told the ABC.

VERDICT: Keep ’em in the fridge, champ.

Do I put onions in the fridge?

Onions stored in the cold humid depths of your fridge will turn into soggy idiots pretty quick, folks. This is because the starches they contain are converted to sugars in such an environment.

It’s recommended you store onions in a cool dry place, but they should keep well enough out in the open for about a week. They need ventilation, too, so don’t be keeping them in a bag, ya bloody goose.

VERDICT: The fridge is bad for onions unless you want them to be soggy, in which case, you do not deserve onions.

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