When you think of Christmassy drinks, I’m assuming things like gingerbread, eggnog, chocolate, and peppermint come to mind. Not cheese. Definitely not cheese. At Starbucks in China, one of the festive lattes on offer this year is the Snowy Cheese Flavoured Latte which…I just have so many questions. Firstly, what the fuck?

Spotted by some eagle eyes looking through the seasonal sippers from all the Starbucks around the world, the Snowy Cheese latte is listed in a press release as “A dreamy new holiday beverage made with baked cheese flavored sauce blended into classic espresso and topped with light whipped cream, blueberry flavored sprinkles and star-shaped crisps.

Cheese…coffee. With blueberry. It literally sounds like it’d curdle as soon as you looked at it wrong.

My guts hurt just thinking about it. (Image: Starbucks)

Now apparently cream cheese lattes are a ~thing~ in Melbourne (according to my workmate who lives in Toorak, make of that what you will), but this isn’t a cream cheese latte, which has the ability to be spun into a sweet, cheesecake-y treat. Oh no my friends, this is some run of the mill cheddar business, not only on TOP of the latte, but mixed THROUGH the latte as well.

Hmm still a hard pass, thanks. (Image: Starbucks)

I couldn’t believe that this was a standalone monstrosity that Starbucks had just served up to its Chinese fans, so I had a bit of a dig and apparently ‘snowy cheese’ is very much a thing. A thing that blurs the line between sweet and savoury, and is also knows as ‘snow cheese’ and ‘snowing cheese’.

It’s mostly just the concept of finely-shredded cheese (typically cheddar) used as a coating for fried chicken, an addition to ramen, and a topping for cakes. The gastronomical rules have been totally broken and cast aside in Chinese and Korean cuisine, people.

Still not sure if I’m game to try it, though.

Image: Starbucks