Mates, it’s Friday, the weekend is nigh, and Reddit conspiracy theories are rocking the bikkie world. What a time to be alive.

Someone’s disgruntled granddad took to Reddit to voice his frustration over his go-to biscuit, Arnott’s Scotch Fingers, accusing the food giant of changing the recipe on us. Classic stitch-up.

In a lengthy Reddit post, he claims to have made the “horror” discovery while showing his granddaughter how to enjoy a Scotch Finger.

“Today I attempted to break the iconic Scotch Finger biscuit into two fingers to show my two-year-old granddaughter how to eat these biscuits, that I myself ate at her age, in a right of passage for all Australian kids,” he began the post.

“We Australians know innately that when offered a packet of Arnott’s Assorted biscuits you chose the Scotch Finger because the moment you get it, ‘snap’ down the vertical, and you have two perfectly formed biscuits. Two for one.

“Well, horror (ensued) as I attempted to snap the Scotchie!” he continued, adding that after he snapped it, it formed two “ill formed stubs”.

He added, “But she did glimpse the carnage and I’m not sure (if) permanent psychological damage has been done.”

He then asked the question – “When did Arnott’s break an Australian icon?” before begging Aussies to “rise up”.

“Protest, write to your local supermarket, canvass your local member, inundate Arnott’s Facebook page with your views, phone A Current Affair, tweet Kochie — do whatever it takes.

“I’m old, and I can live with it, but I’m doing it for the kids. If we remain silent it is they who will suffer.”

Following the absolute uproar from the public, Arnott’s has released a statement denying the wild claims.

“We have not made any recent changes to the current formulation of this famous bikkie,” an Arnott’s spokesperson told news.com.au.

“We bake our biscuits right here in Australia using local wheat, so occasionally if weather conditions have altered the harvest, there can be slight biscuit variations from batch to batch, but the Scotch Finger recipe Aussie know and love remains!” the Arnott’s spokesperson said.

Absolute scandal.