I’d Like To Apologise To Ma For Dissing Her Cooking, Which I Now Appreciate As A Former Child

I’ve had to apologise for a lot in my life: accidentally wearing prescription goggles that belonged to an older swimmer on a snorkelling trip, chucking a tantrum over almost every board game I didn’t win, waking people up at 2am while fetching myself a quick four-course snack — but my most recent apology is aimed directly at my Ma.

I wouldn’t consider myself nor my siblings the pickiest eaters and some of us were even prone to eating a handful-or-two of sand (my brother grew out of that phase well before his 30th birthday), but every now and then we thought it’d be fun(?) to roast our giver-of-birth over her cooking, just for giggles.

I suppose growing up thinking salt and pepper were the only two spices to exist in the world just meant that anything other than the classic combo was a shock to our systems.

Wrong. Oh, how wrong we were.

I’ve actually messaged Ma for her curried sausage recipe more than once as an adult (she calls it a sausage hotpot for the record), so the fact that I’ve come crawling back to get that nostalgic hit of KEEN’S curry is a huge indicator that I crave the food that reminds me of being a carefree kid.

This is supposed to be a wholehearted apology and it truly is but also, are parents all part of some weird conspiracy where they don’t tell you the secret ingredient on purpose, so we consistently go back home for a feed? I have no proof to back this up but I do have my gut instinct, and my gut tells me on a regular basis that Ma’s curried sausage hotpot is superior.

Does she sprinkle an extra dash of KEEN’s Curry Powder in there when I’m not looking? Does she hide an extra onion in her pocket and chuck it in when my back’s turned? I’m this close to setting up cameras in her kitchen to get to the bottom of this, I swear to Simba.

If you’ve also had your family’s home cooking on the brain, there’s a little comp running that just might tickle your fancy.

Simply tell us in 25 words or less what your favourite KEEN’s curry dish is — doesn’t necessarily have to be one your family used to cook for you, it can be a whole new recipe you discovered as an adult — and you could nab one of 20 limited edition prints of the iconique KEEN’s curry powder made by a wildly talented Aussie artist.

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Aussies’ love for that orange tin is unmatched, that much I know.

P.s. just want to apologise again Ma, for the curried sausage thing but also again for accusing you of lying to me about your recipe.

This apology tour is never-ending.

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